Argh.

You know what's really vexing? That I have enough money, in cash, right now, here in my room, right next to me in my little hand-made-out-of-a-kool-aid-canister bank...to get another doll. .o_o

But noooooooo~~ooo~ I have to be all determined to go to Japan. =(

Meh. I've just been in a mood today where I feel like I'd rather get myself this physical, tangible thing now, rather than an experience in the future.

But I'm sure it'll pass. In a few days I'll be all "Nihon e ikitai!!!!"

I think. .... I guess.

We'll see.


I've actually just been depressed today. Mostly because I went to deal with that ticket I got last week. Or rather...tried to. But guess what!? I can't deal with it - I can't just pay it off and be done with it. OH NO. Because remember, kids, nothing can be easy for me.

They WOULDN'T LET ME plead guilty. .-_-

So now I have to go to court, and appear before a judge. Me! I USED TO WORK FOR YOU FUCKING PEOPLE!

And the really ironic thing? I used that handicap permit ("improperly") in order to not be late for a class, and now I'll have to miss that very class to take care of it. .-_-

See, this is what I get for trying to make something of myself. I shouldn't have bothered trying to go to school. I should have just stayed at the D.A.'s office until they DROVE ME TO KILL MYSELF because obviously in the end this education stuff isn't going to do me any good. My poor excuse for a life will find a way to make it all meaningless.

Why do I bother?